Sometimes I feel like my faith is at war with itself.
God calls us to evangelize, to love, to share, but he also calls us to a standard of morality. He calls us to treat others certain ways, to flee from certain activities, and to avoid from talking in certain ways.
And I know that the two are not mutually exclusive.
In practice it sure does feel like they are at war.
There are those I want to bring to church. There are those I want to allow freedom to feel welcome at church long enough for them to see the beauty of the grace of Christ. I want to give them time.
Yet I fear allowing them to be themselves until they see the truth. What will the church say? How will they react when they found out I brought them? How can I allow someone to worship that is blatantly living in sin?
And I know the answer is messy.
And I know the answer is full of grace and love.
So today I ask for prayer, and advice if you have it, because what I know is right to do is not always easy. And today it is difficult. Will you pray that I share Christ's grace by allowing someone to come and see Christ, and allow Christ to change their heart. Pray that I personify love while awaiting life transformation.
Thank you.
Showing posts with label grace. Show all posts
Showing posts with label grace. Show all posts
Monday, April 2, 2012
Monday, March 26, 2012
A Letter to THE Church: Let's Stop The Bullying
Dear Church,
You are dearly loved. You are precious. You hold a special place in the plan of God. For two thousand years you have faithfully shared the faith, passing it down from father to son and mother to daughter.
You are truly awesome.
Yet I write today because I am concerned with where you are headed. I am concerned with what you are doing to yourself. The self-inflicting wounds are hurting you; the lifeblood of the church is draining, and you did this to yourself.
And so I write with a simple message to the church: It is time to stop the bullying.
When did the church decide it was our job to belittle those who differ in opinion? When did Jesus grant us the authority to degrade others, question their intelligence, and dehumanize all who are opposed to us?
It is time you realize, that I realize, that the enemy is not the progressives (who show us that the gospel matters in this generation) or the fundamentalists (who remind us that there are fundamental convictions of our faith).
Our enemy is not the liberal, who reminds us that it is for freedom we have been set free from the law.
Our enemy is not the conservative, who reminds us that not everything old or traditional is bad.
No, our enemy is not church's political opinion--we need each other.
Our enemy isn't the non-Christians--they remind us that we still have a mission from Jesus to make disciples in his name and authority.
Our enemy isn't the homosexual--they provide an avenue for us to demonstrate grace.
Our enemy isn't the Westboro Baptists--they provide an avenue for us to demonstrate grace.
Our enemy isn't the black church, the white church, the rich church or the poor church.
Our enemy is not any part of the church.
Our enemy isn't even any person.
Our enemy is the dominion of darkness, sin, death, and condemnation that rules in this world.
And we need every group of Christians, with all of our oddities, to unite against it.
So please, dear Church, stop.
Stop trying to take out the Calvinists.
Stop beating up the Baptists.
Stop pitting us against one another.
Let us be the Church. One Church.
Sincerely,
A concerned member of the Body
You are dearly loved. You are precious. You hold a special place in the plan of God. For two thousand years you have faithfully shared the faith, passing it down from father to son and mother to daughter.
You are truly awesome.
Yet I write today because I am concerned with where you are headed. I am concerned with what you are doing to yourself. The self-inflicting wounds are hurting you; the lifeblood of the church is draining, and you did this to yourself.
And so I write with a simple message to the church: It is time to stop the bullying.
When did the church decide it was our job to belittle those who differ in opinion? When did Jesus grant us the authority to degrade others, question their intelligence, and dehumanize all who are opposed to us?
It is time you realize, that I realize, that the enemy is not the progressives (who show us that the gospel matters in this generation) or the fundamentalists (who remind us that there are fundamental convictions of our faith).
Our enemy is not the liberal, who reminds us that it is for freedom we have been set free from the law.
Our enemy is not the conservative, who reminds us that not everything old or traditional is bad.
No, our enemy is not church's political opinion--we need each other.
Our enemy isn't the non-Christians--they remind us that we still have a mission from Jesus to make disciples in his name and authority.
Our enemy isn't the homosexual--they provide an avenue for us to demonstrate grace.
Our enemy isn't the Westboro Baptists--they provide an avenue for us to demonstrate grace.
Our enemy isn't the black church, the white church, the rich church or the poor church.
Our enemy is not any part of the church.
Our enemy isn't even any person.
Our enemy is the dominion of darkness, sin, death, and condemnation that rules in this world.
And we need every group of Christians, with all of our oddities, to unite against it.
So please, dear Church, stop.
Stop trying to take out the Calvinists.
Stop beating up the Baptists.
Stop pitting us against one another.
Let us be the Church. One Church.
Sincerely,
A concerned member of the Body
Thursday, March 15, 2012
Changing the Church's Sex Talk
A couple weeks ago I started to share my thoughts about the sex-obsessed nature of the American church. I had planned on posting more thoughts over the following days, but my life changed dramatically when my first son was born! Things have been busy and exciting, and I thank you for your patience, but now I want to return to this topic.
Wednesday, February 15, 2012
Driscoll's Problem Is Calvin, Not Complementarianism
Mark Driscoll is a perfect storm of controversy. Great popularity, widely available media, and unpopular opinions have led to him being lambasted by a great deal of internet bloggers.
Especially since Driscoll's most recent book, Real Marriage, hit the shelves Driscoll has faced a great deal of opposition. Driscoll's view of complementarian marriage is the focal point of the fire. Marriage, many would say, is meant to be a 100% equal relationship with no leader but Christ. Pastor Mark's suggestion of male authority--very much in line with much of the traditi on of Christianity--has been met with an unequaled amount of criticism.
I must pause to ask the simple question: Why? Why is Mark Driscoll's view of masculine hierarchy so distasteful to us? I would suggest that it is not the idea of masculine leadership that angers us, but the type of masculine leadership.
Driscoll's view of marriage is one of absolute, totalitarian male leadership.
And it is not Mark's fault.
It is Calvin's.
John Calvin took the authority and omnipotence of God to mean that God must control every aspect of every detail of his creation.
According to Calvin:
1. Your will is bent and swayed by God to fit his every purpose.
2. You do not make a single daily decision without it being first decided by God.
3. That God, for no purpose that we as humans are privy to, chose to forgive some and reject others.
4. That God's grace, once sent to an individual, is absolutely irresistible. You could not even begin to fight it.
5. That God, though outwardly despising sin, was actually the author of sin, and created it for his secretive purposes in the world.
Yes, this is the way that Calvin viewed God. This is what Calvinism suggests. It suggests that since God has power, he uses it absolutely. It suggests that since God has authority, he wields is coldly and viciously.
Is it any wonder that a man reading the Bible through this lens would suggest an authoritarian male leadership in the home? Can we really blame Mark Driscoll for teaching a natural product of his theology.
The truth, however, is that God did not come as a dictator, but a servant. The image of the invisible God came and became nothing. The leader who led from the basement instead of the penthouse. He was the king who chose love over authority.
What might a marriage look like that embraces a better picture of the God of Scripture? How does our view of God imprint itself on our view of leadership, marriage, parenting, etc?
Especially since Driscoll's most recent book, Real Marriage, hit the shelves Driscoll has faced a great deal of opposition. Driscoll's view of complementarian marriage is the focal point of the fire. Marriage, many would say, is meant to be a 100% equal relationship with no leader but Christ. Pastor Mark's suggestion of male authority--very much in line with much of the traditi on of Christianity--has been met with an unequaled amount of criticism.
I must pause to ask the simple question: Why? Why is Mark Driscoll's view of masculine hierarchy so distasteful to us? I would suggest that it is not the idea of masculine leadership that angers us, but the type of masculine leadership.
Driscoll's view of marriage is one of absolute, totalitarian male leadership.
And it is not Mark's fault.
It is Calvin's.
John Calvin took the authority and omnipotence of God to mean that God must control every aspect of every detail of his creation.
According to Calvin:
1. Your will is bent and swayed by God to fit his every purpose.
2. You do not make a single daily decision without it being first decided by God.
3. That God, for no purpose that we as humans are privy to, chose to forgive some and reject others.
4. That God's grace, once sent to an individual, is absolutely irresistible. You could not even begin to fight it.
5. That God, though outwardly despising sin, was actually the author of sin, and created it for his secretive purposes in the world.
Yes, this is the way that Calvin viewed God. This is what Calvinism suggests. It suggests that since God has power, he uses it absolutely. It suggests that since God has authority, he wields is coldly and viciously.
Is it any wonder that a man reading the Bible through this lens would suggest an authoritarian male leadership in the home? Can we really blame Mark Driscoll for teaching a natural product of his theology.
The truth, however, is that God did not come as a dictator, but a servant. The image of the invisible God came and became nothing. The leader who led from the basement instead of the penthouse. He was the king who chose love over authority.
What might a marriage look like that embraces a better picture of the God of Scripture? How does our view of God imprint itself on our view of leadership, marriage, parenting, etc?
Friday, February 10, 2012
Valleys and Rivers
I will sing of your mercy, that leads me through valleys of sorrow, to rivers of joy.
I was aware of my sin before I was aware of grace. I realized my sin, and my condemnation before love or mercy. The weight of all that was wrong, that wasn't good in me. The weight of the joy of my sinfulness; that I liked doing what was contrary to my Maker.
I will sing of your mercy, that leads me through valleys of sorrow, to rivers of joy.
Walking as fast as I could to get outside, running from the walls that felt like prison. I remember looking up at the cloudless, star-filled sky. In the vastness, I saw Him, the one who created me, showing me the chains that held me so tightly. The sins of lust and flesh, the chains of guilt and addiction. This time, however, I saw more.
I saw hope. The Maker would make me new again. The chains could be broken, the sins forgiven and defeated. I saw grace that night in the southern hills.
I will sing of your mercy, that leads me through valleys of sorrow, to rivers of joy.
The last month has moved slowly. I mean slow. Kylie and I make room for a newborn to enter our lives. Nights are filled with more restlessness than rest.
And again I find myself in the valley of sorrow; my sin bare before me. My thoughts fill with selfishness, anger, and doubts.
I see in how I treat my dear Kylie that I am not loving; I am not like the graceful Maker on the hillside, filling me with hope as vast as the stars. I am short-tempered, slothful, arrogant...
Another layer of the sinful man exposed.
I will sing of your mercy, that leads me through valleys of sorrow, to rivers of joy.
I sit with a head in my lap and a computer by my side, and this song comes playing through the buds in my ears. God's mercy leads us through valleys to rivers; from sorrows to joys. I have seen errors, and grace did not come later, it was only seen later.
Grace came first, revealing sins, tearing down self-righteousness, then filling with hope in the Maker.
This child will surely be God's mirror more than once for me, revealing those things that I have yet to give into his perfect, loving, artistic hands.
And as those days come, I pray that I can sing of the mercy that leads me through valleys of sorrow to rivers of joy.
I was aware of my sin before I was aware of grace. I realized my sin, and my condemnation before love or mercy. The weight of all that was wrong, that wasn't good in me. The weight of the joy of my sinfulness; that I liked doing what was contrary to my Maker.
I will sing of your mercy, that leads me through valleys of sorrow, to rivers of joy.
Walking as fast as I could to get outside, running from the walls that felt like prison. I remember looking up at the cloudless, star-filled sky. In the vastness, I saw Him, the one who created me, showing me the chains that held me so tightly. The sins of lust and flesh, the chains of guilt and addiction. This time, however, I saw more.
I saw hope. The Maker would make me new again. The chains could be broken, the sins forgiven and defeated. I saw grace that night in the southern hills.
I will sing of your mercy, that leads me through valleys of sorrow, to rivers of joy.
The last month has moved slowly. I mean slow. Kylie and I make room for a newborn to enter our lives. Nights are filled with more restlessness than rest.
And again I find myself in the valley of sorrow; my sin bare before me. My thoughts fill with selfishness, anger, and doubts.
I see in how I treat my dear Kylie that I am not loving; I am not like the graceful Maker on the hillside, filling me with hope as vast as the stars. I am short-tempered, slothful, arrogant...
Another layer of the sinful man exposed.
I will sing of your mercy, that leads me through valleys of sorrow, to rivers of joy.
I sit with a head in my lap and a computer by my side, and this song comes playing through the buds in my ears. God's mercy leads us through valleys to rivers; from sorrows to joys. I have seen errors, and grace did not come later, it was only seen later.
Grace came first, revealing sins, tearing down self-righteousness, then filling with hope in the Maker.
This child will surely be God's mirror more than once for me, revealing those things that I have yet to give into his perfect, loving, artistic hands.
And as those days come, I pray that I can sing of the mercy that leads me through valleys of sorrow to rivers of joy.
Friday, January 13, 2012
Church: Home of the Homeless
I am blessed to be a part of a church that cares. It really does. Lowell Church of Christ has several missions and local outreach.
However, even when looking at my church, I am left wondering: Is this all God desires for us?
Today I start discussing the issue of church and poverty, and the first thing we need to ask is simply: What does God expect of us as Christians and as his Church? Today I want to make three observations:
1. God desires his church to do more than give. Luke 4 makes quite clear that we are to proclaim good news to the poor. Proclamation of good news goes far beyond handing a check out to someone. It means providing the means to lift someone into a better life (physically, emotionally, and spiritually).
2. God intends the church to be more than a support center. The New Testament, including Luke 4, provides insight that the church will actually be filled with the poor. They will be part of us. It should be our job to treat with equality those of lesser means, and hopefully bring them to equality. We must stop looking at the impoverished around the world as "other" and start looking at them as "one of us."
3. God intends the church to be the standard-bearer for worldwide justice. If you have not done it yet, read Luke 4. God wants to make the world a place of justice. He intends to use the Church, the hands and feet of Jesus, to be the leaders of this movement toward equality and hope.
__________
I have heard the many who worry about this so called "social gospel." Somehow, by focusing our attention on the statements of Christ that challenge us to do, to act, to live with compassion, we challenge the grace alone gospel. I do not agree.
Grace breeds grace. As we come into contact with the grace of God that forgives sins, it leads us to tangibly display this grace. Grace begats worship that challenges the "who we are" with the "who we were created to be." Grace begats love which leads to compassion.
Grace must be followed by more grace. Grace leads us to care for the poor.
However, even when looking at my church, I am left wondering: Is this all God desires for us?
Today I start discussing the issue of church and poverty, and the first thing we need to ask is simply: What does God expect of us as Christians and as his Church? Today I want to make three observations:
1. God desires his church to do more than give. Luke 4 makes quite clear that we are to proclaim good news to the poor. Proclamation of good news goes far beyond handing a check out to someone. It means providing the means to lift someone into a better life (physically, emotionally, and spiritually).
2. God intends the church to be more than a support center. The New Testament, including Luke 4, provides insight that the church will actually be filled with the poor. They will be part of us. It should be our job to treat with equality those of lesser means, and hopefully bring them to equality. We must stop looking at the impoverished around the world as "other" and start looking at them as "one of us."
3. God intends the church to be the standard-bearer for worldwide justice. If you have not done it yet, read Luke 4. God wants to make the world a place of justice. He intends to use the Church, the hands and feet of Jesus, to be the leaders of this movement toward equality and hope.
__________
I have heard the many who worry about this so called "social gospel." Somehow, by focusing our attention on the statements of Christ that challenge us to do, to act, to live with compassion, we challenge the grace alone gospel. I do not agree.
Grace breeds grace. As we come into contact with the grace of God that forgives sins, it leads us to tangibly display this grace. Grace begats worship that challenges the "who we are" with the "who we were created to be." Grace begats love which leads to compassion.
Grace must be followed by more grace. Grace leads us to care for the poor.
Friday, January 6, 2012
Monday, June 13, 2011
The Dawn of Death
Reminder: This is a portion of my testimony. You can read the first part here. Don't forget that this is PG-13 material, and Mom and Dad are still not permitted to read! The rest of you, I hope you are blessed by the truth of my life--even when the truth is awful.
I don't think I ever prayed more fervently than the moments after. My heart sobbed, hands shook, lungs couldn't fill because of the uneasiness of my body. A heaviness lay upon my soul, a heaviness that I had never experienced before, but one that I would feel on me for several years to come.
Sexual release led to a clear head and a broken conscience.
Masturbation opened my eyes to the death dawning in my life.
I know that many question whether masturbation is sin or not. It is. I knew it in my heart that day, after I experienced a moment that was meant for my wife. I experienced it in the wrong setting, for the wrong reason, with the wrong result.
Instead of joy filled, life giving sexual abundance, I find death.
The Wrong Setting: My first (and every) sexual release is meant for the marriage relationship. Instead, I robbed my wife and myself of experiencing this together because I chose to act on desire before the appointed time.
The Wrong Reason: Sex is not about me. Sex is an act of giving, an act of self-giving love. My reason for masturbation was selfishness, not selflessness. Selfishness kills marriages, it kills relationships in general. Wrong motive lead to wrong action at the wrong time.
The Wrong Result: I have been a faithful husband. However, my past choices mean that I am tainted--even in my marriage. I cannot undo what I have done, and it does affect and hurt my marriage. I had to seek forgiveness from my wife before we were wed. Until you have that conversation with the woman of your dreams, you won't ever realize the trench of this sin.
The sin had entered a couple years before, but it was this moment that I realized that I was sinful. Truly sinful.
Living apart from God.
Not saved (at least I felt--only God knows!)
I cried, I begged, I asked God to forgive.
I promised, vowed, swore that I would never--no more.
But this struggle took over my life, and I thought I'd never get it back.
I don't think I ever prayed more fervently than the moments after. My heart sobbed, hands shook, lungs couldn't fill because of the uneasiness of my body. A heaviness lay upon my soul, a heaviness that I had never experienced before, but one that I would feel on me for several years to come.
Sexual release led to a clear head and a broken conscience.
Masturbation opened my eyes to the death dawning in my life.
I know that many question whether masturbation is sin or not. It is. I knew it in my heart that day, after I experienced a moment that was meant for my wife. I experienced it in the wrong setting, for the wrong reason, with the wrong result.
Instead of joy filled, life giving sexual abundance, I find death.
The Wrong Setting: My first (and every) sexual release is meant for the marriage relationship. Instead, I robbed my wife and myself of experiencing this together because I chose to act on desire before the appointed time.
The Wrong Reason: Sex is not about me. Sex is an act of giving, an act of self-giving love. My reason for masturbation was selfishness, not selflessness. Selfishness kills marriages, it kills relationships in general. Wrong motive lead to wrong action at the wrong time.
The Wrong Result: I have been a faithful husband. However, my past choices mean that I am tainted--even in my marriage. I cannot undo what I have done, and it does affect and hurt my marriage. I had to seek forgiveness from my wife before we were wed. Until you have that conversation with the woman of your dreams, you won't ever realize the trench of this sin.
The sin had entered a couple years before, but it was this moment that I realized that I was sinful. Truly sinful.
Living apart from God.
Not saved (at least I felt--only God knows!)
I cried, I begged, I asked God to forgive.
I promised, vowed, swore that I would never--no more.
But this struggle took over my life, and I thought I'd never get it back.
Tuesday, June 7, 2011
How Small We Make Something Big
If you have spent long in church circles, you have heard this question:
If I died when I was about to ________, would I make it to heaven?
Before I prayed the prayer.
Right before I confessed Jesus as Lord.
Right before I was baptized.
The essence of the question is really this: What is really essential? How much must I really do? What are the requirements?
I see two major problems with this mindset.
First, this is the DEFINITION of works. We are saved by grace, not works. Salvation is a gift. Many of these questions arise in the debate over whether baptism is a work or not, but as soon as we begin looking at ANY of our responses to grace as required activities, we are focused on works and not grace.
Therefore we make prayer a work.
We make confessing Jesus a work.
We make baptismal submission a work.
Second, this question displays a worldview problem. We are consumed with the bottom line. The smallest number, the least possible work with most reward idea.
We minimize God's grace on the cross to a checklist.
When did Jesus say he wanted us to complete the paperwork?
Didn't Jesus come to heal sick people inside and out? Didn't Jesus come to seek and save those wondering lost?
The moment of my salvation was about 2000 years ago, halfway across the world.
Everything, and I mean everything I do now is a response to this grace.
Grace.
The books I immerse myself in reflect my response to grace.
My willing submission to Scriptural teaching reflect my response to grace.
My laughter, anger, dreams, fears, lusts, self-control, schedule, work, family, finances, worship, ideas, art, and hope all become recreated in response to grace.
Grace is big, let's stop treating it small
If I died when I was about to ________, would I make it to heaven?
Before I prayed the prayer.
Right before I confessed Jesus as Lord.
Right before I was baptized.
The essence of the question is really this: What is really essential? How much must I really do? What are the requirements?
I see two major problems with this mindset.
First, this is the DEFINITION of works. We are saved by grace, not works. Salvation is a gift. Many of these questions arise in the debate over whether baptism is a work or not, but as soon as we begin looking at ANY of our responses to grace as required activities, we are focused on works and not grace.
Therefore we make prayer a work.
We make confessing Jesus a work.
We make baptismal submission a work.
Second, this question displays a worldview problem. We are consumed with the bottom line. The smallest number, the least possible work with most reward idea.
We minimize God's grace on the cross to a checklist.
When did Jesus say he wanted us to complete the paperwork?
Didn't Jesus come to heal sick people inside and out? Didn't Jesus come to seek and save those wondering lost?
The moment of my salvation was about 2000 years ago, halfway across the world.
Everything, and I mean everything I do now is a response to this grace.
Grace.
The books I immerse myself in reflect my response to grace.
My willing submission to Scriptural teaching reflect my response to grace.
My laughter, anger, dreams, fears, lusts, self-control, schedule, work, family, finances, worship, ideas, art, and hope all become recreated in response to grace.
Grace is big, let's stop treating it small
Tuesday, May 31, 2011
When Winning Isn't
My wife is my lifesaver. If you know me at all, you know that I do not say this lightly. She looked at me at my most disgusting and loved me. She showed me grace when she didn't need to. But that is a story for another day.
I begin this way so that you know that what I am about to say is in no way an indictment against my wife. She is a jewel. There is just one thing that bothers me:
The silent treatment. When she is upset she simply "doesn't have anything to say." I hate the silent treatment. I feel trapped because I am so often an ignorant jerk that I don't have a clue what I've done wrong to begin with. Nine times out of ten I have screwed up, but sometimes I just don't know how. The silent treatment doesn't help, at least that is what I thought.
So a little more than a year ago, Ky and I were having one of these fights, one of these I said something stupid but I don't know what fights. We find ourselves sitting on the couch, staring at the wall not saying anything.
And the tension is enough that it is driving me crazy. I decide the silent treatment has to end, so I raise my voice and start getting mad because she won't tell me what is going on.
"I just don't have anything to say to you right now." She responds and my blood boils.
"Fine! Just forget it." I exhale and I leave the couch and walk upstairs. I turn on my PlayStation and I play Madden until I calm down. I thought I would wait her out, that she would see my side of this, that I would convert her to my view of dealing with this conflict.
Then I heard the sound of victory.
It was that gasping for air that comes as you try to calm yourself down while crying.
Ky was crying, and in my prideful anger I had her right in the cross-hairs. I descended the stairs trying to hide my sense of victory, I would show her that she needed to honor me!
I held her as she cried, all the while waiting to unleash the words: This is why you shouldn't use the silent treatment.
But then I made my fatal flaw. I asked her what was wrong, and her words cut.
"you left me."
She was mad, but she still was there, and my moment of pride and anger showed her the one thing I never, ever wanted her to see in my life: faithlessness. A lack of Stand By Me attitude. I could win the battle at the cost of losing my teammate. She was damaged because I wasn't there.
Sometimes winning isn't.
Sometimes its best to sit side by side and lose together, because at least your together.
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