Thursday, March 21, 2013

Under the Weeping Willows

Under the weeping willow trees
I come to rest
To stop
To die

Under the weeping willow trees
I find my path
my purpose
my life

Weeping willows surrounded a small creek that ran down one side of campus.  It was the remote part of the campus, the part where people were few and rare.  It was a special place for me.

The willows hid the world from me; and me from it.  I didn't venture there often, but I always went on purpose.  I went with desperation and conviction and a need to be hidden underneath the low hanging branches.  I went needing to hear, to know, to cry or to think.

Some of my biggest life decisions were decided under the branches of those trees.  During one summer I sat under those trees and made the decision to pursue a life with my now wife and to abandon the thought of traveling to India.  I decided ministry was the route for my life instead of radio broadcasting--even though I certainly have the face for the latter.

More often though, it was under those cool shade giving branches that I paused life.  When life got hectic and nerves were short I went under the willows.  It was hear that I would meet with Jesus just to be with him.  No plan or purpose or request, just dwelling.

It has been five years now since I graduated and left the hills of Tennessee for the arctic tundra gentle plains of Indiana.  I have served in ministry these five years, witnessed the miracle of birth, watched the passing of life, laughed, cried, and everything in between.  It has been a good five years, and I look forward to continuing for many more years on this journey with my church family.

But I still miss the willows.  I have yet to find a place--the place--that my soul will just stop and rest and be.  I have yet to find a place where I palpably feel God's presence.  Town living is different than country living or campus living.  I don't know the tricks of finding quiet places for my soul to relax and dwell.  I still have the important times of soul dying and resurrection in my church life--the communion of our Lord.  I still have heartfelt worship and genuine prayer.

But I am still looking for that place to just be with God.

Where do you look?  Where do you dwell?  Where is your secret spot or special spot that you and God just hang out together?  What place has become holy for you?

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